Just earlier this week, a friend of mine had met the Devil and it had placed upon my friend the most ultimate sin: he didn't like bacon anymore. What fool what sorcery is that in which a human could be stripped of that God-given love of the most heavenly of all foods: bacon? How can one lose the taste for bacon? Bacon is what makes the world go round and probably 4 our of 5 people would rather take a freshly and perfectly cooked pound of bacon over $100. So, how did it happen?
My friend picked these up before a trip and had one. They are the worst tasting things and if they were meant to taste like bacon, then they were likely designed by PETA to prevent people from eating more pork products. They took one of the defining flavors of bacon: the smokiness, and made a candy out of it. I tried one and spit it out. It tasted like I put a BBQ charcoal in my mouth. I tasted pure smoke and char and nothing that would even remotely strike me to swallow the bean.
My friend was put off and didn't want anything to do with bacon so I pulled out my secret recipe: bacon brownies. What was that? Wait, you mean regular chocolate brownies with bacon? No, I mean bacon brownies. I did these before and are easily accomplished with just a tad bit of molecular gastronomy.
So, you cook the bacon and render the fat out, then add the fat with some things and make some brownies. They lightly taste like bacon and sugar and vanilla and are perfect.
The result: my friend said that the brownies may have turned him good again, in that he would soon be able to eat a couple of them, had he not eaten any of those beans. Likely though, I think he said over time, he could enjoy bacon more, if it tasted nothing like the candy and more sweet. I did my good deed for the week.
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